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A stroke is sudden and can result in an emotional change. Everyone’s experience of stroke is unique. You might feel shock, denial, grief, anger and guilt. These are all normal when faced with changes.
What can cause you to feel like this?
- Anxiety
- Frustration
- Anger
- Depression
- Emotionalism (Difficulty controlling your emotions)
- Mania and euphoria
Anxiety
It is normal to feel anxious after a stroke. Feeling anxious can affect your recovery.
You may be frightened about having another stroke, your family or how you will manage with finances.
We all experience slightly different things when we are anxious.
Some symptoms include
- Feeling restless
- A sense of dread
- Feeling on edge
- Difficulty concentrating
- An increased heart rate
- Trembling or shaking
- Feeling short of breath
- A dry mouth
- Feeling sick
- ‘butterflies’ in your stomach.
It may not always be clear what you are anxious about, it is important to remember that these feelings are normal and can be controlled.
Frustration
Nearly all stroke survivors will deal with frustration. A lot can change after stroke and so quickly, that it can be hard to accept.
Stroke survivors may feel frustrated about:
- Not being able to do what you used to do
- Having to rely on other people
- Everything taking longer than it used to
- Not being able to work or do other things
- Not being able to go out
- Not being able to express how you’re feeling
- Saying the wrong words
- Making mistakes
- Forgetting things
- Feeling tried and having no energy.
Feeling frustrated is normal and many people will have to learn how to deal with these frustrations properly, if not dealt with then they can build up and cause further problems.
Anger
Following a stroke feelings of anger may be experienced more often. It may be difficult for people to control their temper and people may feel angry for no reason.
It is important to:
- Let it out
- Talk to others about your feelings
- Focus on positive things
- Try relaxation techniques
- Listen to others
- Work out triggers/causes
Some anger is normal however it can affect health and recovery if anger takes over.
Depression
It is normal to feel down or sad after a stroke. Depression is when feelings of hopelessness and sadness do not go away.
Common signs of depression
- Feeling sad or down
- Feeling worthless, helpless or guilty
- Feeling hopeless or desperate
- Losing confidence
- Losing interest in things you used to enjoy
- Lacking energy or motivation
- Not going out or avoiding others
- Finding it difficult to concentrate and make decisions
- Having problems sleeping or sleeping too much
- Loss of appetite or eating too much
that at least one third of stroke survivors will have some form of depression within the first year.
It can return at any point so it is important to know what to look for and how to get help and support when needed.
Emotionalism
A stroke can affect ability to control mood and emotions. This is most common in the early stages of stroke.
Some people may experience emotions they never have before, such as becoming more upset over things, some laugh at inappropriate times and others may start to swear when they didn’t do so before their stroke.
Signs of emotionalism
- Finding yourself crying or laughing for no reason
- Expressing your emotions more intensely than you actually feel them
- Feeling that you have no control over emotions
- Feeling like even the smallest thing can set you off
- Having emotions that seem out of place
- Having emotions that come and go quickly
By nature some people are more emotional than others so signs of emotionalism depend entirely on what is normal for the individual.
How can I manage the emotional effects?
It is important to acknowledge that with the suddenness of stroke it can take some time to work through recovery.
The psychological effects are best acknowledged so that you can work through this side of recovery, as well as through the physical recovery after stroke.
- Acknowledge if you are struggling with any emotional issues and talk to others about how you feel, such as family, health professionals and support organisations.
- Be open to looking at ways to help yourself, such as setting goals, using techniques to manage your mood.
- Asking for support to help with emotional difficulties can be really helpful.
- Family may also need support and can access help from many sources.
A stroke can also impact on your intimacy, and for many reasons this can be daunting to people.
Will it get better?
When emotions are overwhelming it can be difficult to process. Remember there are lots of people who are there to help cope with the effects following a stroke.
Some things that might help include:
Talking therapies
Talking therapies allow time and space to explore difficult feelings with a trained therapist.
Cognitive behavioural therapies
CBT can focus on helping to break the cycle of negative thinking and behaviour.
Contact your GP or stroke team
If you are struggling with emotional changes who can point you in the right direction and may refer you to a mental health professional such as a counsellor, a talking therapist, a clinical or neuropsychologist who will provide a listening service and interventions suited to meet your psychological needs and help you to get better.
Medication
Although this may not work for everyone, some medications can help with issues such as anxiety or depression. Your GP or consultant in the stroke section can advise this.
Talk to family and friends
Family and friends may not be aware of how you’re feeling. Tell them how they can help. Family may need support themselves too from voluntary organisations or stroke professionals. This can be discussed with the stroke team or their GP.
Intimacy following a stroke
It could be communication difficulties, physical difficulties or cognitive changes.
Sexual intimacy is important to many people and understandably questions can arise which people can feel embarrassed about.
If you are having difficulties within this area, we recommended to speak to your partner first and foremost as they may be able to support through this.
If you don’t feel comfortable discussing it with a partner but you do with a professional, speak with your therapy team or GP.
Useful links and contacts
Stroke association
Tel: 0303 3033 100
Email the stroke association
Mind
Samaritans
Call: 116 123
Email Samaritans
CALM
Tel: 0800 58 58 58
You can find out more information on sex and relationships following a stroke. You can also contact your local community stroke team.